Filipinos spend an average of 8 hours per day working. That means that, within the 24 hours that you have each day, a third of that is spent with your colleagues, and sometimes, because of the friendship that formed and other commitments, even more. But, in a group of people working together with varying personalities and opinions, sooner or later, a conflict will arise. There are various ways of handling it, but there’s no denying that communicating effectively during conflict is important.
The Secrets of Communicating Effectively During Conflict
Choose the atmosphere
Communicating effectively during conflict means that you and whoever you conflict with should discuss in the right atmosphere. This way, you can both be rational and avoid outbursts that will just hinder resolution. Confrontation is good, but find the right place and time for it. The worst conflicts erupt when someone is caught at a bad time. At the same time, you most probably won’t like to discuss whatever problems you’re having with someone with all your co-workers present, right? Especially if their presence isn’t necessary.
You can ask to talk with that person privately, and when both of your tempers aren’t flaring. This way, you can think of the ways you can approach it.
One of the most common conflict management mistakes is not listening. Shutting the other party before hearing it out, and worse, throwing out accusations, will give you no progress. A vital part of communication is listening, especially in communicating effectively during the conflict. Don’t get caught up in trying to reach your point across that you completely block out what the other person is saying.
You can solve the conflict easier if you’re willing to listen to the other party and then from there, work together. And, if you’re willing to listen, you can also prevent future conflicts!
Pay attention to wordless cues
Actions speak louder than words. You can understand a lot of things just by paying attention to someone’s body language. There are a lot of body language signs that can tell how the person you’re talking to really feels about the conversation. You can also spot lies through it! At the same time, you’re body language also speaks volumes about your thoughts.
Wordless cues can make or break conflict resolution. Make sure you have steady eye contact and a steady tone of voice. Refusing eye contact and speaking too softly can show that you’re guilty or lacking confidence while staring too intensely and raising your pitch will come off as aggressive. Make sure also that you have proper posture to show that you know what you’re doing and what you’re talking about. That you’re not just blindly entering into a discussion. And, use gestures appropriately. You can also look for these cues in the other person to know where he or she really stands.
Be careful with your statements
Sometimes, when feelings get in the way, you can say things that you probably won’t say if you weren’t in the state. One secret to communicating effectively is being mindful and careful with your statements. As said earlier, don’t get caught up trying to get your point across and throwing accusations. Saying things like “you always…”, “you never…”, or “you’re so…” will not help you in solving the conflict at all. It’ll only sound like criticism to the other party and will put them on the defensive.
Be responsible for your feelings and your statements. Starting your statements with you as the subject, “I”, can help. It shows your perspective on the situation so that the other party knows how you feel. And then use questions to get back on track.
Communication is vital to conflict resolution. How else will you solve the problem if you don’t communicate and understand each other? With these secrets, you can now communicate effectively during conflict!